Now we’re going to dig a little deeper. My screen of normality should be well and truly ABLAZE by the end of this one….
I have a ‘foot fascination’. That’s a term I’ve come up with myself, just a minute ago infact. I don’t think it’s a foot fetish, it’s something different. How so? Well I’ve seen foot fetish porn, and I don’t like it. And I’ve seen other stuff that foot fetishists are into (art and what not), and I don’t identify with it whatsoever. In fact I find it a bit scary.
My ‘fascination’ has actually got attributes of both a fetish and a phobia. The best way to explain it is with an analogy. Picture this: you’re in a change room, and a person of the same sex to you comes in (or of the opposite sex if you’re gay), and in the process of getting changed, becomes naked in front of you. You might take a tiny peek, right? Just for a second. It’s not that you -desire- to see their naked body, it’s not that you get a sexual buzz out of it per se, but there is a compulsion to look nonetheless. It’s more of a “hey, weird, check it out” kind of thing. I’d describe that as a ‘fascination’, and that’s how I feel, not by choice mind you, in respect to the foot.
I don’t know if anyone else anywhere in the world has this or not, or anything else comparable. I’ve never asked anyone about it, I’ve never inquired into it. Because it seems so unusual to me, it’s always been a source of great shame. I’ve always wanted it to go away and I’ve tried to ignore it, though unsuccessfully. Fortunately, it has become less noticable over the years.
Even though I don’t see it as a fetish, there -is- a sexual element. Go back to the change room scenario: this time it’s someone of your sexual preference getting undressed, and they’re very attractive. It’s not just a ‘fascination’ now, right? Kind of the same deal with the foot. Let me be clear though - I certainly prefer tits, ass and pussy, but there is still some thrill for me with feet if they’re attached to a hot body. But the context is very important - it needs to be natural. If it’s gratuitous in the way that the regular foot fetishist might like it, then it doesn’t interest me. Perhaps you’d describe it as a voyeuristic foot fetish. Fuck, that sounds weird!
So how did I develop such a thing? Well as you hopefully -wouldn’t- have noticed, I have a rather unsightly callous on my foot, mainly on and around the big toe. It’s been there for a long time, I think it started when I was about 8 years old. Yes, I’ve tried different shoes and various other remedies, but it won’t completely go away. Apparently it’s from the way I walk and is incurable. Anyway, because it’s mildly unsightly, I’ve always been uncomfortable with it, in the same way someone might be uncomfortable with any other injury, defect, abnormality etc on their body. I didn’t like people to see it (still don’t), so I guess that’s how the complex began and turned into what it is today.
If you’ve ever suspected that I’m a freak, now you can be sure.
Confused? This explains it: http://truthblog.tumblr.com/